by Mitchell Skelton

Have you ever noticed how easy being mad at someone is when they are not in your presence and how hard it is to stay mad at them once you come face to face? How many of us have spent countless minutes even hours rehearsing the perfect line that expresses our anger, only to toss is into the “scrap pile” when we finally get the opportunity to deliver?

Perhaps this is why the Hebrew writer encourages us not to “give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another” (Heb. 10:25). Even more, he gives us the charge to “consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds” (Heb. 10:24). Staying mad at someone is hard as you are simultaneously trying to encourage them. When we practice true fellowship with our brothers and sisters in Christ, we also begin to learn more about them. During this learning process we gain valuable knowledge about their conduct and moods. In essence, “We know where they’re coming from.” We are not often too critical of people for irrational or abnormal behavior when they have good reason to act in such a manner.

Imagine a group of fish swimming together in a school. All of them are moving in the same direction with comparable style when suddenly one of them starts destroying the unity. He begins to twist and swerve from side to side with precarious moves. The older fish are annoyed with the nonconformity of this immature adolescent. They show their disapproval while voicing disgust, “We don’t swim like that around here.” Turning to their offspring, they declare, “That type of behavior is totally unacceptable.” Before they can take action against the renegade fish, his thrashing tail disappears at the surface of the lake. A hook in his mouth rather than rebellion in his heart was the cause of all his distasteful activity.1

Sometimes it is hard to accept the actions of another person especially when what they are doing “just isn’t done.” If we follow the advice of the Hebrew writer then we will not have to question the persons’ motives, we will already know about the hook in their mouth.

1 Illustration from “And God Wants People,” Mary Lou Lacy, 1962, p. 35