by J. Randal Matheny

At a funeral, it borders on cruelty to say, "Do not weep." The hot tears for one's loss can hardly be contained. Shock, sadness, grief are all legitimate human emotions whose expressions may be accepted and even encouraged. Though eventually the crying subsides, the pain continues, the sadness lingers on.

Before Lazarus's tomb, "Jesus wept" (John 11:35). John does not mention what provoked his weeping, but his inner turmoil suggests he was moved deeply by the moment.

So the words fall strangely on our ears from Jesus' lips, "Do not weep," when he and his followers, entering the city of Nain, meet a train of mourners carrying the body of a widow's son to its burial. Luke says his compassion prompts the words (7:13).

Often, well-meaning words do the most damage. Spoken to cheer up, even the right words, proffered too soon, or in false hope, wound worse than an enemy's bitterest invectives.

So why does Jesus say to the mourning widow, "Do not weep"?

These words presage her son's resurrection. Jesus tells the woman not to weep, because he will shortly remove her reason for weeping. He will raise her son from the dead.

If anyone can justify saying, "Do not weep," Jesus can. If someone could offer more than words, our Lord could. And did.

When Christians worried about the future of deceased loved ones, Paul explained with consoling words their secure status, "that you may not grieve" (2 Thess. 4:13-18). Instead of saying "Do not weep," he encouraged, "Therefore comfort one another with these words" (v. 18).

The best one can do, Paul says, is to "rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep" (Rom. 12:15).

So we weep with those who weep, we remember that Jesus wept, we recall the security of disciples who have preceded us in death, and we comfort one another with such words.

And yet ... we still hear Jesus speak, "Do not weep."

Though we do not look to the coffin for the dead to rise, through the blur of our tears we raise our eyes for the rending of the skies.

Midst the cries and wails of our grief, we listen for an angel's trumpet.

Between sighs and flashes of painful memories, we lose our breath at the thought of rising in the air to meet the waiting Lord.

"Do not weep." We know the words are meant for us as well. And we know that he will take away our reason for weeping.

Any moment now.